I Know I'm Not Through With it Yet

I am irritated, though mostly at myself.  And I ought not be. I managed to have a nearly perfect Saturday today.

Leisurely and delicious breakfast; finally getting a chance to peek at the rabbit who so often comes out to eat clovers after I've left for work.

Hot, relaxing shower. Hair came out great, picked out a cute outfit.

Off to the 'Friends of the Durham County Library' book sale. A used book sale - one of my favorite things. Overhearing a few funny remarks, like 'ribs' replacing 'cheese' in the expression "Want some cheese with that whine?" How Southern. A pithy but enjoyable convo with a fellow sci-fi nerd about what really belongs in said section. Leaving the friends with a GIANT stack of awesome books that only cost $27:



Afterward, a quick walk around the downtown loop. Stopping at my favorite local lunch joint - Toast. Hip, but not so hip I feel out of place. Common man hip. Full of bright colors and bright conversations.



Fresh, local and seasonal ingredients turned into mouth-watering paninis. I choose the 'local farm egg, tallegio and chives' with a side salad of mixed spring greens and shaved parmesan. It is amazingly simple, yet as warm and fulfilling as it looks:



Coming home, reuniting with the bro. Watching the first few innings of the Saturday Fox baseball game (free on basic digital antenna airwaves - we don't have cable at our house). Yankees/Red Sox - a treat to secretly root against both of them. Half watching the game. Using my favorite pen to record inside each of my new books the date and location where they were acquired. Delighted to find that a few previous owners had done the same, now joining and sharing our history by adding a name. Hoping the next owner will appreciate it as much as we do.

Cracking one of the new books for a few hours. "Because It Is Bitter, and Because It Is My Heart," by Joyce Carol Oates. Trying to give her another chance, as she's a favorite author of both my sister and my oldest brother. Enjoying the change of style from my most recent read. Raining but not threateningly. Just lightly enough to create a pleasant din to accentuate the softness of an afternoon spent in a book.



Indian take out for dinner while watching "That 70s Show" on Netflix with the bro. How to spend the rest of an otherwise perfect day? Ruining it, briefly, but trying now to recover it. Write. Get it out. I'll leave you with some Elliott Smith.

Also, Marketing Unto Oblivion (or perhaps, observation)

I have been on a reading kick this year.  We're just about three weeks into the year and I've already finished two books, am halfway thru a third, and about 40 pages into a fourth.  The two completed have long been on the reading list (and the bookshelf) and I'm just now getting around to them. 

The first was "Never Let Me Go" by Kazuo Ishugiro.  I had read and enjoyed "When We Were Orphans" and "The Remains of the Day" so I was eager for another offering by Ishugiro.  It did not disappoint.  One of the things I love most about his writing is the depth of description he gives to the characters' thoughts and emotions.  It makes them so relatable, and exerts a strong pull on me as a reader to empathize (and even compare to my own life experiences or past emotions).   This book took that constant quality one step further.  Written as a narrative of memory, Ishugiro's protagonist remembers in the way many of us do: she'll be telling one story and suddenly, realize that in order to properly tell it she has to tell us something else first, and on and on till each story is a beautiful, fractal tree of memories branching off in all directions but inherently related and connected.  Some are just wisps, some are branches as thick as trunks themselves.  I felt like I was listening to an old friend talk rather than turning the pages of a book.  To boot, the story itself is quite moving and maintains a sense melancholy without feeling heavy.  I really liked this book.

Next, I read "Things Fall Apart" by Chinua Achebe.  Both my sister and my sister-in-law are English teachers, and so I had often heard about this book but never read it.  I picked it up for two bucks at a used book store and finished it in about 4 days of evening reading.  Full of lush description, it was a venture into a world sadly completely alien to me.  I'm still thinking about it and haven't quite figured out what I want to say about it.  I liked this book quite a lot too, but not as much as "Never Let Me Go."

The book I'm halfway through is "The Wordy Shipmates" by Sarah Vowell.  I pick that one up, read 15 pages and put it down again.  The subject matter, though written with humor, is a little heavy to be a page-turner.  Since it's non-fiction I feel I can read it alongside whatever fiction I'm working on and it's not a distraction.  The current fiction tome I am wending my way through (and the impetus for this post) is "A Scanner Darkly" by Philip K. Dick.  I've read other Dick but hadn't yet cracked this particular volume, given to me for Hanukkah a few years back by my brother.

I was about 48 pages into this book when something infuriating happened.  I had just started to get a feel for the characters.  I was making conjectures about what their stories might be.  Where was it all leading, I wondered, noticing clues hidden throughout the text like little nuggets of gold gleaming in a dark coal mine.  I put the book down for a minute to chat with my mother (who was visiting for the weekend).  When I picked it back up, I took notice (really for the first time) of the cover.  Though the book was originally published in 1977, this particular edition had been published in 2006, shortly after the release of the movie version starring Keanu Reeves.  The 'Waking Life' style animation of the movie was the theme of the cover, showing rough watercolor sketches of Reeves, Robert Downey Jr, and Winona Ryder with geometric shapes of varying sizes serving as a kaleidoscopic backdrop.  In the top right hand corner, a bright lime-colored circle featured bold black words reading "NOW A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE".  "Man, they are trying hard to sell this book," I thought to myself.  Then, I flipped the book over.  Now, I don't know what possessed me to start reading the back cover (maybe I was hypnotized by all the cracked out colors) but I did it all the same.  And do you know what it said?  IT COMPLETELY SPOILED THE BOOK!  I won't go into detail here because in case you haven't read it I don't want you to be similarly spoiled, but suffice it to say it contained a "Keyser Sosa size" spoiler - a spoiler of 'epic' proportions, if you will.  Now, I'm sure the reveal it gave is not the most important thing in the book.  More than that has to happen or there's not much of a story there.  But an important cornerstone has been revealed!  My sleuthing for clues was one of the most enjoyable parts of reading this story, as was the general feeling of anticipation often felt when reading books of the 'thriller' ilk.   I haven't been able to pick the book back up for four days.  I have developed a sad, apathetic attitude of "What's the point?"  And I am PISSED at these publishers.  Just as so much writing has become 'all flash no substance' so it seems has the marketing of said writing.  "We can't get someone to pick a book of the shelf and buy it unless we garish up the cover or reveal the plot on the back!  Better yet, let's do both!"

Anyway, I just felt the need to rant about this a little bit.  It's very frustrating as a reader to see such blatant disregard of the author's need to spin a yarn.  And it wasn't always like that.  Most of the really old books I have (as my brother astutely pointed out) have little more than a title on the cover, and sometimes not even that!  ((Sigh)).

Anyway, getting sleepy again.  Worked from 8am to 10pm today!!!  But tomorrow?  Rangers/Hurricanes game - hurrah!!!! :)

Borges

I have loved Jorge Luis Borges since I first set eyes upon his work in Spanish class my junior year of high school. I couldn't understand him nearly as well in those days, but I still loved his stories. I am currently rereading his collected short fictions in English, as translated by Andrew Huxley and published by Penguin. One of the things I love most about Borges is that he challenges me, but without making me feel stupid or ignorant, as so many writers tend to do. Whether or not it's intentional, writers are sometimes too intellectual for their own good and it creates an aversion in the reader. But not Borges. Rather, his stories are so compelling and the context so unique, I am eager to pull out my dictionary and look up both the meaning and the subtext of his words.

I shall give you a particularly awesome example from a story called "The Cruel Redeemer Lazarus Morell." The word is alluvium. Dictionary.com (who's definition in this case is more complete than my usual standby Merriam-Webster.com) cites the primary definition of alluvium in two parts: (1) a deposit of sand, mud, etc., formed by flowing water, and (2) the sedimentary matter deposited thus within recent times, esp. in the valleys of large rivers. However, in a subsequent definition, #5 of 6, it states "Sand, silt, clay, gravel, or other matter deposited by flowing water, as in a riverbed, floodplain, delta, or alluvial fan. Alluvium is generally considered a young deposit in terms of geologic time." The latter part of this will be praised for its relevance and cleverness in just a moment.

Now, in the case of "The Cruel Redeemer Lazarus Morell," Borges begins the story by introducing the peoples of the Mississippi River Delta during the height of slavery. Specifically with alluvium, describing the relationship of Christianity (which is crucial to Morell's character) and the slaves: "In the early nineteenth century (the period that interests us) the vast cotton plantations on the riverbanks were worked from sunup to sundown by Negro slaves...Onto an alluvium of beastlike hopefulness and African fear there had sifted the words of the Scripture; their faith, therefore, was Christian...The Mississippi served them as a magnificent image of the solid Jordan." I cannot stress enough how much I LOVE the use of the word alluvium here. It ties together everything that he is speaking to. Literally, the Mississippi Delta probably had its own alluvium, as alluvium often collects in a delta or floodplain. Metaphorically, the youngness of alluvium "in geological times" referring to the newness of Christianity to the slaves, and their own newness in America as a country. Then symbolically, almost as though in the way that alluvium is a natural substance, and force, that cannot be contained, so religion was forced (either culturally or literally) upon the slaves. And then of course I love it purely for it's rareness and unconventionality. The word is just so multi-faceted in its use, and it's amazing.

Borges, I love you!!!! :)

Go Away, Dalai Lama

My only motivation for posting today is to get that picture of me and the Dalai Lama off my frontpage. I hope this post is enough to do it. So let's see. What have I been up to lately.

Well, about a week ago I got promoted at work. So that's kind of nice. Although it gives me that icky feeling that I somehow have everyone fooled that I give 2 cents about finance, when really I could care less. And yet I've been promoted. Seeing the disconnect here? I guess it's just about the fact that even though I don't care, I still give it my all. How I manage to do that I'll never know. I'm still waiting for inspiration to strike. Where are you my perfect job??

I've been reading quite a bit lately. I just finished Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister by Gregory Maguire, also the author of the more widely read Wicked which I read last year. I really enjoyed Stepsister. As the back-story of Cinderella, it spins a dark, gritty reality that brings the fairy tale down to a relatable level. No longer is Cinderella a poor unfortunate child who was taken advantage of by her evil step-mother, but rather, a petulant self-centered child who let life take advantage of her, rather than ever attempting to chart the course of her own destiny. Her run in with the prince was constructed by one of her step-sisters in an attempt to save her from a life of ruin. I recommend it as a quick, entertaining read. Just before that I finished Life of Pi by Yann Martel, which IMHO deserves all the praise it's been getting. A fascinating examination of the implications of the food chain! :) I'm currently working on The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd, which has been on my 'to read' list for ages. It was a gift at last year's Hanukkah celebration. Speaking of Hanukkah, I'll have plenty to read when I'm finished with Bees. My brother gave me several new ones on my to read list last night at our family's much-belated Hanukkah celebration. I received Neuromancer, I am Legend, and The Woman Who Walked Into Doors, by William Gibson, Richard Matheson, and Roddy Doyle respectively. I'll admit a little ashamedly one of the reasons I'm so keen to read Doyle is that J.K. Rowling cites him as her favorite author. I'm eager to see if I find any stylistic similarities in their works.

So that's reading. Let's see. I also finally gave in about 2 weeks ago and downloaded I-Tunes. The Queen of all illegal internet downloading has thrown in the towel. Tired of switching sites every few weeks as they get shut down, tired of hoping I was getting the radio edit, but actually getting the Live edit, tired of poor sound quality. These were my reasons (plus a fully exhaustive list I'll spare you) for just deciding to make the switch. I was so pumped the first week, and gleefully downloaded 37 songs. Then I looked at my playlist and thought, "Gee, even though I like all these songs were they really worth $40?", then "I can't believe I just spend $40 on something completely intangible." then "Oh man, I miss free downloading." Although it is nice to hear songs completely free of pops and clicks and to not have to fill in tons of tag information for them on my own in order to get them to sort appropriately on my mp3 player. So I guess there are pros and cons to both legal and illegal downloading. My wallet regrets the choice, but in the end it'll probably be worth it. Some of the songs I am obsessed with right now: "Take You There" by Sean Kingston, "Piece of Me" by Britney Spears, "Don't Stop the Music" by Rhianna, and "Sexy Lady" by Yung Berg. I am in a HUGE pop swing right now. I go back and forth in wide swaths of genre. I just finished about 4 months of being stuck on Q104.3 (classic rock) and being nauseated by any other music station. Now, suddenly as a lighting strike, I have an insatiable appetite for pop. Funny, eh?

OH! I don't think I ever posted about this in October, but I bought a new car. I sold the Sentra to my brother, who's car was totaled by a driver who fell asleep and hit it on the street where it was parked. I bought a Nissan Versa. It looks basically just like this:



I LOVE IT! It's so cute and tiny, but still really spacious inside. And my insurance company (USAA) hooked me up with one of their preferred dealers who gave it to me at cost + $300. So it's got all these crazy features I never would have gotten if I actually had to pay for them but are REALLY nice to have. It's got built in bluetooth, so I don't have to talk on the phone any more or even use a headset. The calls come through over my car speakers. Which, by the way, include a BOSE subwoofer. If I turn the bass up all the way it's a bit deafening. My other favorite feature is "Intelligent Key." It's that sensor in your keys where your car can tell if the key is within 3 feet of the car and it will automatically unlock if you push a button on the door handle. It makes carrying the groceries out to the car SO MUCH EASIER. I no longer have to shift all 10 bags to one hand while digging around in my purse or my pocket to find the keys. Plus, were I ever alone in some dank parking garage being pursued by a kidnapper or rapist, I wouldn't have one of those 'movie' moments where the keys fall underneath the car and I'm blindly reaching around for them while the killer pulls me back out by my ankles. So it's all good. His name (my car) is Eugene Morris Jerome. After one of my favorite plays "Brighton Beach Memoirs." When I first got the car it screamed NWM (nerdy white male) to me, but at my brother Seth's urging I waited a few months before naming him. But Eugene just stuck!

Anyway, I'm sure there's lots more I could write about everything under the sun, but I'm trying to make a 1:15 showing of "Atonement" at my local theater so I must go. It's oscar season so that mad movie seeing pace has begun. Ta-ta for now!

Reading More Again

Yesterday I read an entire book in one day. It has been years since I have done that. Other than the fact that by the time I had finished, I realized I hadn't eaten in 5 hours and was starving, it was an extremely enjoyable way to spend the first half of my day. The book was one that many of you out there have already read. An important hub of the science fiction canon, which I myself am only now reaching (having just gained an appreciation for sci-fi a few years ago). The book is Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card.

I know, I know. I should've hit this one a long time ago, but to my credit, I do already have under my belt: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, I Robot, Snow Crash, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Slaughterhouse Five, A Wrinkle in Time (in my mind more like fantasy but included anyway on many top 100 sci-fi lists), Cat's Cradle, Timequake, and several others. Some clearly screaming holes in my experience author-wise include Asimov (I Robot being the only of his offering I have read), Heinlein (haven't read any), Bradbury (haven't read any), Arthur C Clarke, and from the old school Jules Verne. Some other canon I clearly have to hit book-wise (and plan to soon) includes: Dune, Foundation, Neuromancer, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, The Martian Chronicles, Cryptonomicon, and Hyperion. Anyway, the point is, I'm working on it.

As for Ender's Game itself. Well, clearly I enjoyed the book and found it to be an engaging page-turner (or I wouldn't have gone 5 hours without food!) You know what? Gotta get back to work, more on the book later. A sneak peak to my reaction? Speaker for the dead = SILLY.